Thursday, July 30, 2009

Thirty Mile Zone

So, Keith has been going in to work really early in the mornings, this Summer. That means that I have to find something to watch on early-morning TV. Thankfully, Cheaters comes on at 5am and then TMZ at 5:30am. I've never watched TMZ before, but I find it oddly entertaining that early in the day. Of course, by the afternoon, I'm sickened with myself for having enjoyed it so much.

It's a strange show, and I really sort of can't stand that Harvey guy. He just seems like such a know-it-all. But he also really seems like a HUGE geek, so who knows... he might be kinda fun to know in real life. I sort of doubt it though. I do wish they had some little bios or something (on the show... I'm not going to search this shit down online) on the people who are featured. I don't mean the celebrities that the paparazzi follow around; I mean the people who intro the little pap bits on the show. By the way, how do I get a job at TMZ? I want to know, because I want to work there and stalk that pretty blonde boy. He seems dumb, and he also seems to hate fat chicks, but man... he sure is pretty.

Ok, moving on... here's a list of things that TMZ thinks are important:

#1: K-Fed's fat now. Who cares? TMZ does. So does Yahoo!, actually. Apparently it's big news. No pun intended. The headline on Yahoo! was actually, "Kevin Federline's weight gain shocks fans!" Really? Why? Also, Fans?

#2: Michael Jackson is dead and his doctor is the one who killed him. I will give it to TMZ that they were the first ones to officially report him as being dead. I just think it's kind of sad that THAT is something to be proud of in this day and age. At this point, I could care less. The media and the Jackson family are why this is still news. I have a feeling that the majority of the rest of the population wishes it would just go away. I feel sorry for his kids, but I feel sorry for all the kids in the world who lost their fathers today. I'm sure it sucks beyond belief, but maybe something good will come out of it. Maybe they will have some semblance of a regular life now.

#3: American Idol's "Glitter Girl" was killed in a hit and run. It's pretty awful that this poor girl's 2 "famous" moments came because she was possibly drunk. I do feel for her mother, but I mostly just feel bad that this is big news.

#4: Jon and Kate + 8... enough said. I do find it pretty funny that Harvey rolls his eyes every time something about them comes up, yet they are featured in every single episode of the show.

To wrap this up, I might bitch and moan about how awful this celebrity crap is, but I eat it up just like the rest of the world does. Now I'll just sit patiently and wait for that Octomom show to start.

P.S. I forgot to shout-out my THANKS to TMZ for getting that damn "put sunglasses on your dog's butt; it'll make people say wut" song stuck in my head for the past 5 days. Thanks a lot. I really appreciate it. Ugh.